.:+:.The Life of a Sponge Head.:+:.

Musings, Life, Nostalgia (2016)

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i just read my entry from last night and my sentences did not make sense at all.

Post adrenaline rush
The endorphins from my 2hour workout are starting to kick in. Im actually supposed to be sad cos im terribly missing someone and ive been remembering some stuff i shouldve already forgotten..but im actually quite happy that i got to experience those times with him. It's nice to look back at those happy times we had although its also a bit depressing that it ended in a very bad way. =/

anyway..i just want to enjoy my cookie for now..happily nibbling through the small chocolate chips..just like how i enjoyed those moments then..and how im enjoying my time alone tonight.

Today marks the start of entertaining good vibes. I dont wanna be bitter about it anymore. =)

couting down again
i have 3 more weeks before i fly back to manila. im feeling extremely excited to meet up with all my friends again and take pictures like it's the last day of the world, but at the same time, im also afraid to go home and face this certain situation i got myself into. im still trying to figure out how im gonna go about this "situation" but i dont want to stress about it that much cos i'd like to make happy memories out of my 4 weeks in manila. im seriously depending on all the nights out and all the experimental eat-out days i hope i'll be having with all the people that i miss. life full of work really makes a person dull. i cant even remember the last time i seriously had a great time with a bunch of people here. i mean, yeah sometimes we do get a bit rowdy (thanks to the assistance of our constant party companion, smirnoff) and laugh our hearts out but its still different when you get to do those with people you've actually known for longer. im completely comfortable with a handful of names here and im happy that i have them to trust to have fun with.

riiiigghhttt.. so i still have 3 weeks to complete my shopping list for everybody. im STRUGGLING to stay on my pasalubong budget cos i bet im gonna be spending more that what i actually saved for this holiday. hahaha. ok lang i guess, as long as i keep the people around me happy then i guess all the spending is gonna be worth it. i just hope they wont expect a lot because i seriously dont have enough money for everyone. wahahhaha

anyway. dinner time. will update again soon enough.

i seriously feel like an idiot now.

now now now now now


i miss this blog
i kinda miss how i was before i started working. Being a bum isnt actually that bad because you get to have all the time in the world to do anything, anywhere you please. I miss being able to lie down the whole day or spend hours and hours in the gym everyweek just because i wasnt so busy doing anything so "adult-y" or just having the simple privilege of alone time without worrying about something important i have to do, or something else that should be at the top of my priority list before i set off for work the following day.

i also miss reading novels or playing those silly facebook games (i.e typing maniac) everybody got so excited about when facebook started. My days off now are all about doing laundry, fixing the room, cleaning up, doing groceries, cooking food to feed my hungry stomach and blah blah blah.. IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT CHORES! i wish i can take a break from these 'days off" and actually take a day off from a day off. get it? wag na. effort.

so um yeah, how am i? i used to type in everything here when everybody else cared about LJ. writing here used to be very therapeutic for me. i've been reading my past entries and i miss how spontaneous it was for me to write down everything i had in mind. im sure ang dami ko nang grammatical errors ngayon o kaya sobrang nonsense na ng mga sinusulat ko kasi napupulpol na english ko kahit na dito ako sa England nagtatrabaho. pulpol sobra hahaha.

i think i remember saying in my previous post that i deleted my facebook account as a new year's resolution. well um..i restored my facebook account the other day because i think i'm through with my social isolation mood. the real reason behind it was that i tried to detach from my close friends just to see if they would miss me. echos lang. i dont think anyone noticed anyway so hahahaha yeah, now i feel more unimportant...it wasnt therapeutic at all. mwahahaha lesson learned. now im gonna move on =p

hmmm hmmmmm..what else? today was a very fruitful day at work. i was able to do a primary total knee replacement on my own (with coaching parin siyempre pero keri na) but unfortunately, i wasnt able to set the first cement mix properly so we had to open another one. i guess it's better that i make a lot of mistakes during my first independent case so at least i know what not to do for the succeeding cases. dizziziiit. i can finally say i'm not a virgin for PFC anymore. i just need a little more practice and im set to soar on my own.

yeah i suddenly got bored typing so im gonna update again next time. gym naman muna.

it's been almost 6 months since i moved here and in that 6 mos, i've managed to disappoint a lot of people including myself. I've gained so much weight and neglected my regular intensive workout routine. (but im still paying for my gym fees wtf) most of my clothes look shitty on me now. thank goodness i have to wear bulky clothing to keep me warm or else, i'd have to shell out a shitload of money again for new and larger clothes.

soo uhh yeah.. im counting 5 weeks from now and i'll be on a 22-hour flight back to manila. im really excited about it because im gonna see every person i miss every single day i spend here in london. im also quite pressured because i only have 5 weeks to get back in shape so people wont be so shocked to see me in this state. i mean, im fine with gaining weight but im suffering from early exhaustion and additional lazyness because i feel so heavy to move about. it just doesnt feel right.

hmm what else..

ah yeah, i deleted my facebook account before the new year started.. wala lang. i dont even know why i deleted my account. i just tell people that i deleted it so i can have more time to do things because facebook consumes so much of my time once i login...

well actually i deleted it so i wont stop checking someone's page. it's a new year, i have to move on.

the year i'd like to forget. 2010..you suck.
year end tradition's a couple of days late..but what the hell..

What did you do in 2010 that you'd never done before?

resigned from my first job
did something really unforgivable/cruel/stupid
did another something that will never ever be forgivable
applied for a post in london and got it
moved to the other side of the world with no known relatives nearby
sent my very first balikbayan box
bought a car
had my very first long-distance relationship
had my heart broken
did my own laundry
fixed my own room
cooked my own food..and other independent shit i never did when i had a yaya
set off a fire alarm
payed for my own bills

Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
none for last year. same shit for this year..i never got to keep those new year's resolutions

Did anyone close to you give birth?
-my cousin, and someone else who almost did

Did anyone close to you die?

What countries did you visit?
- london, northern ireland, thailand

What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
-the determination to stick with my decisions..and to ALWAYS THINK STRAIGHT. f. it.

What date from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

april 9 - ='(
july 2 - day i left manila to work here in london
20-10-2010 - first heartbreak
dec 19 - day my family came here to visit and spend the holidays with me
jan 2 - the day they left ='(

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
im working in london, living independently in all aspects of my life, slowly getting over a terrible heartbreak

..and yeah im still standing

What was your biggest failure?
- i lost 2 important people in my life because im so stupid.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
- same shiz

What was the best thing you bought?
- a plane ticket back to manila this feb

Where did most of your money go?
- food and bills..and my balikbayan box.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
decorating my room..which isnt much of a success really.

What song(s) will always remind you of 2010?

safe with me
doorway to my dreams
club cant handle me

Compared to this time last year, are you:
a. happier or sadder? -- sadder. im miserable
b. thinner or fatter? -- fatter. fattest i've been since 4th year highschool. binaboy ako ng london eh
c. richer or poorer? -- relatively richer? pero ngayon poor na ule.

What do you wish you'd done more?
exercise. read. THINK, make proper decisions and have sound judgement

What do you wish you'd done less of?
fool around

What was your favorite TV program?
got addicted to chuck for about 2 weeks. we dont have TV eh

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

What was the best book you read?
caring for the perioperative patient. a hardbound book i bought at the library for £2.

What was your greatest musical discovery?
hmm wala

What did you want and get?
- employment here..a car..bla bla bla...mostly material stuff.

What was your favorite film of this year?

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
23. i dont remember what happened during my birthday..i dont even think i celebrated hehe

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
better decisions in life. hay

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
kung anong cheap, sige lang go.

What kept you sane?
hillsong church

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
wala eh

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010:

there are bullies. dont let yourself be bullied
work is a diverse area. people backstab, people will mistreat you and look down on you. be sure to know yourself before you feel disheartened.
love isnt just about rainbows. you have to experience rain before you appreciate the beauty of the rainbow :)

..those were the ones from 2009. i guess i'd say the same things for this year plus one more thing:

knowing you can get away with doing things doesnt mean that you can do wrong things. doing something wrong can never ever be justifiable. people live and learn through their mistakes but sometimes, the gravest, most stupid mistakes in life are the ones you wouldnt want to live remembering.

What was the nicest thing someone told you about yourself
you can always do better.

london so far
i've been here for 3 weeks and i can really say that london's been nice to me =) although the hospital where im staying at is a bit "disorganized" in it's layout, the distance i have to walk to and from theatres is a good form of exercise. i get to walk going to "the slopes" which is also known as the heart of the hospital while basking in the cold london weather. temperature here's alright although the breeze could really turn my nailbeds blue sometimes, most especially during early mornings..but hey, im not complaining. i'd rather have this than have sweaty armpits all the time =p

the daylight thing also shocked me when i got here. at first, i had a hard time sleeping at my usual bed time (9pm) cos it's almost always sunny at this time and the sun goes back up again at around 4am. the sun here never sleeps but the wind is very very very cold. again, im not complaining =)

whoever said london is a high-cost living area is SO WRONG!!! almost everything here is cheap when compared to Philippines prices (well except maybe for toyo and suka and skyflakes which sell for approximately 1 gold bar each) like, you could get really nice sneakers here for 2 GBS (less than 140php) regular price or signature bags for about 1/4 it's counterpart philippine price. if i didnt have much control over my spending and food budget, i would've gone bankrupt in a week..sold all my clothes (which aren't that many anyway) and asked tourists in the subway for money.

this place is just soooo beautiful. the buildings are so historic,people are disciplined, they do what they say and people ALWAYS COME ON TIME! you can never feel cheated in london..unless you're just plain stupid and you buy overpriced stuff like souvenirs and stinky boat rides.

maybe someone should write a song about this city too..like how alicia keys made a hit song out of new york or how katy perry made something for california.

im gonna build my dreams around you, london!!

see you soon
in exactly 44 minutes, i'll be leaving this old house with all my memories.

lets just hope this career move is gonna be worth it =)

My closet is such a mess right now.. I just dumped all the things i couldnt bring with me during my trip. Hay caramba!! This 20kg limit is such a pain in the a**.. My luggage bag alone weighs 10lbs..my jackets weigh about the same and my shoes..ok dont get me started with the shoes. Haha

last month..i was so set on organizing a big party before i leave but i eventually got frustrated that i couldnt think of a place to begin with soooo..im not gonna celebrate anymore. Ha. Ha. Ha. Im just praying hard that someone invites me to go out cos id like to see everyone before i leave. i just dont have the time and the money to organize one now. =P

i'll be leaving on july 1..together with 14 other people who are far more experienced than I am. Haaay Lord..please help me survive. Im really praying that those british doctors dont eat me alive while im in the operating theatre..or else i'll be on the first flight going back to humid pilipinas. Hahaha..mas love ako ng mga tao dito!!

Ayon. Blog again soon..i just hope we have wifi access in the area.


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